Learning to Be

Hey ya fellow earth-dwellers.
It's been a whiles since I posted some of my random thoughts and/or not so random thoughts.
Part of that sad fact is due to life being such woman with all its drama, and partly because I know that my mother reads this blog (Hi Mom!).

But I thought I should go ahead and type away for a few minutes anyway.

I recently came across a question that asked what was one thing I had learned this year. I pondered this question thoughtfully and came to the conclusion that I have learned much this year, and probably could not give justice to each lesson in the time frame I was given.
And so, I shall attempt to let you in own a few of the things I have come to understand in (a few days short of) 365 days.


Life Lesson Learned

#1. Time stops for no man.
This is one of those things that I've always known, but never really accepted. I'm just now coming to terms with the fact that I can never go back. I can never relive. Life goes on. Things change. Friends change. Loves change. I change. And you know what? That's ok.
I figured that out without any therapy, thank you very much...

#2. I'm more spiritual than I once thought.
Last year, if you had said something even hinting at the word spiritual I would have burst out in laughing. Before, being spiritual meant dancing crazy and saying "Thank you Jesus" every three seconds. Now I realize it's the search, the questions, the pursuit of God. It's not about what you do that makes you spiritual, but how you approach life. How you view the world.
And even though a little part of me rolls its eyes as I say it, I think I qualify.

#3. Beauty is so important.
I've always known that beauty is more than just a pretty face, but I haven't actually tried to put my finger on "what is beauty" until this year. I could write you a book on what I've discovered in this "pursuit of beauty", but in a nutshell, I've found beauty to be nearly everywhere. And almost always more so in places where you least expect it.

#4. I have a great family.
If you would have told me a couple years ago that I had an amazing family I probably would've just shrugged my shoulders and said "yeah I guess". But now a days I'm not so quick to take them for granted. Do they annoy me? Yes. Do they hurt me? Sometimes. Do they influence violent thoughts? Heck yes. But I can get over it. I can let go now. I can forgive. That's one of the things I have to thank my Family for; teaching me that forgiveness is necessary to living happily.

#5. My time will come.
Even as I type that, I feel a little pang of sadness in my chest.
Why? Because everything about that sentence goes against everything I am. I want to take control; plan, plan, plan. Do and do some more. Independent. Instant gratification.
But more than all that...I want to know. So bad. And I don't. I don't know when my time will come, I don't know what it even entails. All I know is I'm not in control and, you guessed it, that's ok. That's a big one for me right now. Letting go of the terrifying future and just living the best I can now.

#6. I am capable of growth.
Last year I viewed myself as a very set, very fixed individual who would be lucky if she could get around to forgiving that one kid who always scribbled on her paper in Sunday school (I know where you live...). Now, after such a hellaious past few years, I realized that I have the potential and (more amazing still) the will power to be a better person. And stuff that would have killed me a few years ago, don't matter so much anymore. Maturity, huh? Who'd have thought...

#7. It's ok to not be perfect.
It took me 18 years to even give this assumption a chance, but it turns out to be very true. Never have I ever considered myself perfect. In fact, I've always been very aware of the fact that I'm not. It's just that, for some reason, I felt that I had to prove to everyone else that I was near perfect because no one wants a dysfunctional person to deal with. For some reason I had to be the calm one, the good one, the right one. Now I know I can be irrationally emotional, maliciously bad, and dead wrong and it will be ok.

There's more of course, but I think that's enough for now.
Enjoy life, my friends.
I'm learning to, and so far, it's been pretty fun. ;)

ttfn

A Little Encouragement....

Michael Buble

Haven't posted much lately, but in honor of Michael Buble's "Crazy Love"album release this past week, here's a little snippet of an interview that I found to be quite humorous.
Enjoy. And try to control your inner fan-girliness. ;D

Greater Love

I stood on a dry and barren ground.

The chalky red earth stirred restlessly around me.
...The sand slithering along the dunes...
One dark, dead, scraggly tree marked the horizon.

One...dead...tree...

Then I saw it there, flying fast against the wind. A form.
Beautiful. Frightening. Free.
Like a lion, but feathered like an eagle; the air swelled with the rhythm of it's wings.


A Gryphon from the East.
The brightness of the Sun was harnessed in the glint of its bronze coated feathers.
The fluidity of the wind governed its movements.
Awe inspiring and magnificent; I watched as it flew nearer.


But then suddenly...a great darkness came upon us...
Thickening the air with a haze that could be felt, I heard the being as it fought against the power and felt its struggle.

...And then witnessed its descent from the heavens.

Wings torn but triumphant, its body hurled to the ground.
Its impact shattered the world...and something changed.

As I drew closer to the wreckage of the body I saw that, among the broken and torn wings, lay a man. On his side, his back toward me, and breathing laboriously.
His back bloodied...his body bruised...

Hesitantly I reached out to him, and turning his face towards mine, saw that he was Love.
Where his heart had been there was a deep wound; and before I could react I felt the knife in my hand.

...and the warm stickiness of his blood between my fingers...

He opened his eyes, clear and nearly white, and spoke fondly as he placed his wings into my arms:

"For you..."

Mark DeRidder Animation

Stumbled upon this today and couldn't stop smiling. In fact the whole Animation Mentor group has put up some very funny and entertaining clips there on YouTube. The celebrity bit is my favorite so far. ^-^ Enjoy and check out their other stuff.

Page to Film :: The Westing Game

Basic Plot Summary:
Sixteen individuals that live or work in the Sunset Towers apartment building are summoned to the hearing of the will of wealthy industrialist, Samuel W. Westing.
The will takes the form of a puzzle, and they soon learn that they must play along if they have any hopes of receiving any of the deceased businessman's money. Following the wills instructions, they are divided up into eight pairs, each pair given a different set of clues, and challenged to solve the mystery of which of them killed Samuel W. Westing. Whoever solves the mystery will inherit Westing's $200,000,000 fortune, and they don't have much time left.



List of Characters:
(thanks to Wiki for helpful character summaries!)

>>>>>>>

Tabitha-Ruth Alice "Turtle" Wexler: Largely neglected and brushed aside by her mother in favor of her older sister Angela, Turtle acts out to get attention, often kicking shins, especially when someone touches her braids. Turtle approaches the Westing game like a market capitalist, and ultimately sees through Westing's misdirection to understand the real mystery behind Sam Westing's game.

My Cast Choice: Georgie Henley



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Theo Theodorakis: George and Catherine Theodorakis's high-school-aged son, Theo is a nice enough kid, but not probing in his analysis. He often fails to see the real truth behind the obvious facade. He takes care of his brother, Christos, but uses his brother's condition as an excuse to not choose a college to go to.

My Cast Choice: Max Thieriot



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Angela Wexler: Most of the tenants of Sunset Towers dismiss Angela as just another pretty face. She is engaged to up-and-coming plastic surgeon Dr. Denton Deere with the strong support of her mother, although Angela still harbors reservations. Although her little sister Turtle would scarcely believe it, Angela is jealous of Turtle's ability to defy authority.

My Cast Choice: Claire Danes



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D. Denton Deere: Interning to become a plastic surgeon and engaged to Angela Wexler, Denton Deere is sometimes depicted as being absent-minded or inattentive.

My Cast Choice: Lee Pace



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Grace Windsor Wexler: Grace is conscious of social class to a fault; she is extremely concerned with presenting herself as culturally sophisticated and high-born, fancying herself an heiress and a decorator rather than a housewife, stressing her regal "Windsor" name, and identifying her podiatrist husband as a "doctor." She is not as shallow as she comes across, having married for love and not for money, but is determined that her daughter Angela will fare better in life than she did.

My Cast Choice: Diane Lane



>>>>>>>

Dr. Jake Wexler: Jake Wexler is a podiatrist (foot doctor) and an avid bookie. He is a caring father and loving husband. Jake Wexler mostly just tries to keep his family together, worrying about Angela's insecurities and his wife's anxieties.

My Cast Choice: William H.Macy



>>>>>>>

James Shin Hoo: Having failed at his career as an inventor, he started a restaurant in Sunset Towers that isn't very successful and he doesn't understand his wife or his "dumb jock" of a son. Despite his surly demeanor, though, he does have a caring side, expressed through his practical and ingenious solutions to others' problems.

My Cast Choice: Jackie Chan



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Sydelle Pulaski: Sydelle is a habitually overlooked person. She decided to fight against the anonymity brought on by her working-class upbringing as the child of immigrants by capitalizing on whatever chance events might bring her attention: her having the only transcript of the will (even though it is in Polish), by dint of her secretarial training; her young, attractive partner; her injury, which she exaggerates by painting her crutches; and her accidental status as a Westing heir itself.

My Cast Choice: Frances McDormand



>>>>>>>
Doug Hoo
Otis Amber
Berthe Erica Crow
Flora Baumbach
Josie-Jo Ford
Edgar "E.J." Plum
Sun Lin Hoo
George and Catherine Theodorakis
Christos Theodorakis
Dr. Sidney Sikes
Sandy McSouthers
and Julian R. Eastman have yet to be paired with an Actor and in some cases I think would be best played by an unknown.

I really wish I could have done the whole cast but I just wasn't finding what I needed to complete it. :/ Maybe you think you could?
Feel free to offer any suggestions, or ask any questions as to why that person. Or if you just hate the whole list and feel like you need to say so, say so!
This is America, gosh dang it! Act like it.

"Oh beautiful for spacious skies..." ;D


Up next:
The Great Gatsby...^-^

Page to Film :: The Canterville Ghost

Basic Plot Summery: An American family, the Otises, move to the English countryside and purchase the rumored haunted Canterville Chase. Ignoring the warnings from the previous owner and the neighbors alike, they move in and set about cleaning the place up, including the centuries old blood stain that adorns the sitting room. After learning who made the stain and of whoms blood was involved, the family is soon visited and terrorized by the Canterville Ghost himself, once Sir Simon Canterville and eternal owner of the mansion.
But try as he might the American (and Americanized) family simply won't be scared away, and only the 15 year old daughter Virgina takes any pity on him, and ultimately saves him from his eternal damnation.



List of Characters:

>>>>>>>

Lord Canterville: Previous owner of the mansion, and supposed relation to the Ghost, he sold the house to Mr. Horace B. Otis readily but didn't shy from the details when telling Mr. Otis what he was getting himself and his family into.

My Cast Choice: Christopher Plummer



>>>>>>>

Mr. Horace B. Otis: The boisterous head of the Otis family, Mr. Otis first dismisses tales of a ghost in his newly purchased English house, arguing that the modern country of America has already bought up anything of value from the Old World. A calm man, he scolds the twin Otis boys for throwing pillows at the ghost, then reasons that if the ghost will not use the lubricator, the family will take away his chains. Silly, Stubborn, American.

My Cast Choice: Kevin Spacey



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Mrs. Lucretia Tappan Otis: The spirited matriarch of the Otis clan, Mrs. Lucretia Tappan Otis, a former New York beauty, is renowned for her “superb profile.” Sir Simon views her as a gross materialist because she offers him Dr. Dobell’s tincture for indigestion after having misunderstood his ghostly laugh as a sign of a medical disorder. Generally undisturbed by the Ghost’s performances, Mrs. Otis possesses a “really wonderful amount of animal spirits.”

My Cast Choice: Kyra Sedgwick



>>>>>>>

Virginia Otis: The somewhat puritanical, beautiful fifteen-year old daughter of the American Minister, inspires the love of the young Duke of Cheshire as the story begins. And unlike the rest of her family who try and "cure" the ghost, when Virginia encounters Sir Simon, she pities him and tries to help the weary spirit.

My Cast Choice: Emma Watson



>>>>>>>

Duke of Cheshire (Cecil): Desperately in love with the fifteen-year old Virginia Otis, the boyish Duke of Cheshire proposes after watching her win a pony race. However, his guardians pack him off to Eton, and he must wait to marry. But his impetuousness cannot be quelled.

My Cast Choice: Michael Angarano



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The Twins (Stars & Stripes): The youngest children of the Otis family, the twins are wild hooligans. They throw pillows at the ghostly Sir Simon’s head, hit him with their peashooters, and throw nuts along the corridor in an effort to trip the Ghost. Irrepressible, the twins achieve their greatest triumph when they create their own ghost from a hollowed-out turnip, a bed curtain, and a kitchen cleaver. Their constant pranks leave Sir Simon shaken, as his every plan for revenge is thwarted by the twins’s efforts.

My Cast Choice: Brent and Shane Kinsman



>>>>>>>

Sir Simon Canterville (Ghost): Haunting Canterville Chase since he was starved to death in 1584 by his dead wife’s brothers, they murdered him because he had murdered his wife for the trivial reasons that she was plain and a bad housekeeper. For three hundred years since, Sir Simon has frightened the inhabitants of Canterville Chase and has relished his role as resident ghost.
However, when the rational American Otises arrive, the Ghost realizes that his audience does not appreciate his performance. No matter what he tries, he cannot frighten the Otis family. Initially the butt of the twins’s pranks and an annoyance to the practical Otises, the Ghost becomes an object of sympathy. Weary and despairing, Sir Simon begs Virginia Otis to pray for him so that he can finally achieve eternal rest.

My Cast Choice: Jason Isaacs



>>>>>>>

Have you read the book? Agree with my casting choices? Are totally in love with Mr. Plummer like myself?!
Then please comment, and share your thoughts.

Up next: "The Westing Game". ^-^

From Page to Film: Books I'd love to see made into Movies.

History is a prophet in reverse. And one of the many things History has showed us over and over is that book to movie adaptions fail. 95% of the time they just flat line. Graphically.

But just like the need to eat at that one Taco place despite all the "incidents", we as people (who enjoy watching other people in a dark room for hours) must have our chance at ruining every literary masterpiece we can get our hands on.
It's just our thing.
Like Pixie sticks.

A few movies I'd like to see the Film Industry seriously produce are as follows:

* Cantervillve Ghost - Oscar Wilde
* The Westing Game - Ellen Raskin
* The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald
* Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
* Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
* The Sword In The Stone - T.H White
* War & Peace - Leo Tolstoy
* A Separate Peace - John Knowles
* A Wrinkle In Time - Madeleine L'Engle
* Scaramouche - Rafael Sabatini
* Dracula - Bram Stoker


Many (if not all in my opinion) are regarded as classics in most circles, thus raising the stakes.
The price of failure is a steep one when you take on well established literature, and I don't know of any director who'd like to be pegged as the person who single-handedly caused bookworms and literary snobs 'round the world to riot, protest, and send strongly worded e-mails.

But when someone who has insight, patience, lots of money and (most importantly) a love for the story decides to take that risk, sometimes the end result is surprisingly good.


My plan is, book by book, to give you my ideal cast for each movie and maybe why I think they'd be best suited for the part.

'Til then, feel free to share your own thoughts on the matter. ^-^

Movie Trailer :: Fantastic Mr. Fox

Came upon this lovely looking romp a couple weeks ago while browsing the good 'ole Internet Movie Database.
It looks odd and the animation is pretty old school...
But that's why I like it.
Apparently based off the book of the same name (also by the author of "Charlie and The Chocolate Factory), "Fantastic Mr. Fox" looks nothing short of utterly enjoyable.

And whats not to like about the distinguished and and dashing Mr. Clooney voicing an equally suave and mischievous Fox? *smile*
Billy Murry, Owen Wilson, Meryl Streep...how could it -not- be amazing?

Guess we'll find out come Thanksgiving time... ^-^

||Joe Pug Music ||

Yesterday I down-loaded the Lollapolooza sampler from iTunes and was pleasantly surprised to find more than a few good tracks. The best being, in my opinion, Joe Pug's offering "Hymn #101".
I was so impressed that I hit up the 'ole Google search engine and found his official site.

After skimming it a bit (ok...after reading the first page) I saw that he was offering a sampler of his new EP "In the Meantime" for free in mail-able and download-able form.

Side note on the mail-able copy: They're running a little behind in that department due to currently being on tour and having received a lot of requests. So if that's the way you'd like to go, be prepared to wait a whiles. -But- if patience is not your strong suit...I suggest to you the fast download which comes ready with the album artwork.

And now, before I leave you to savor the wonderfully richness of "In the Meantime", I'm going to post the lyrics of my favorite track from the whole EP: A Thousand Men.



"A Thousand Men" ~ Joe Pug

See Thomas Jefferson on the eve of Bunker Hill.
Writing words to die for.
Writing sentences to kill.

They've come to paint his portrait
So he grabs a chair and sits
As the surgeon orders cotton
For a thousand tourniquets.

~
For God and country...
For us and them.
Every good idea kills at least a thousand men...
At least a thousand men.
~

See the able-bodied Christian in a dark and savage land
Tellin' all those who will listen
That God was once a man.

Through needles eye so narrow.
He will lead them four by four.
He's got nine hundred shackles.
He needs at least a hundred more...

~
A thousand men.
A thousand men.
Every good idea kills at least a thousand men...
At least a thousand men.
~

See the able-bodied student in his laboratory coat.
Whispering calculations
Like prayer stuck in his throat.

Soon he will discover
Some flawless medicine.
But right now he needs an oven
That holds at least a thousand men.

~
Some are the means.
Some are the ends.
Every good idea kills at least a thousand men...
At least a thousand men.
~

One thousand one...
One thousand one...
Every man I know
Thinks that he's one thousand one.

Nine hundred nine...
His day is done.
Every man I know
Thinks that he's one thousand one.


...I know I'm one thousand one...

The Fate of Eve

Brittle locks whip limply in the wind. The tower has crumbed but it's too late.

Ravens pluck at her bloodless flesh...

Where is her lover?

He's forgotten to rescue her...

Broken form lies torn apart on the roadside. All in vain for her father has died.

Wolves feed on the horse as the final petal drops...

Where is her prince?

He's forgotten to save her...

Waves beat mercilessly against the shriveled body. A wide empty hole where the heart had been.

Crabs dig deeper, burying the evidence in the sand...

Where is her knight?

He's forgotten to love her...

Stiff, cold, dusty and finally dead. A thousand loveless years have stopped her heart.

Spiders do their best to mask the horror of the corpse...

Where is her savior?

He's forgotten to kiss her...

Pearlized fingers curled around a rotten apple. The lovely and empty lie believed.

Rats sip the sticky juice that drips from her lips...

Where is her hero?

He's forgotten to warn her...

...This is the fate of Eve...

New Proflie Pic:

Epic, no? ;}

INTJ: Or why I'm weird.

So you may have heard about this personality test...
It's been around since 1962, was originally created to help women who were entering the industrial workforce, and is basically creepy accurate with its results.
Yes, ma'am.
It's the good 'ol Myers-Briggs

Well recently, I came across a book, "Please Understand Me II" that included the Myers-Briggs test and being an avid random quiz taker, I filled it out.

The Results: INTJ
(This is the part where the creepy music plays and you cover your toes in fear)

Yes. Horror of horrors; I am a (gasp) Mastermind!

I'm just paraphrasing now, but basically this means that I'm a judgment loving, technology hugging, authority dismissing, social avoider, but very effective, occasionally genius, cold-hearted romantically closeted witch; who may eventually take over, or otherwise enslave, the world for her unwholesome purposes which may or may not include free museum days, etc, etc, etc.

Ok, so a tad exaggerated, but that's part of the package.

We're mysterious creatures, us INTJ's, and rare to boot. No more than 1% of the population in the world have earned the right to bare those initials, and my gosh aren't we thankful.
First of all, it wouldn't be any fun if there were a lot of other people like me and secondly, it'd be fatal to the planet if there were. Let's just say it was a very good thing God did when He decided only to let a few of us slip through at a time. Take a gander at the facts below and you'll catch on as to why.

A Few Things to Know About the INTJ's in Your Life.*
*Some points can also be attributed to other Rationals.

> If it seems like we don't do much besides bring up annoying things like "facts" and "reason", the truth is this:We do do a lot. Most of the time just not things you can see or measure.
Our impact is a subtle one. It's true that in a social setting we're just good for a laugh, and not really what you'd call "vital to humanity"; there are a lot of really helpful personality types out there and INTJ's just don't rank high when it comes to humanity stuff. But we do our part by doing our thing, helping you with your thing, taking over your thing when you screw it up, and then going back to our thing. We're like The Reserves of Life. We only step up when we feel we have to, and most of the time only when we're sure we can actually help. Our part is important; it's just not always obvious. And for the most part we're ok with that. A "thank you" would be nice every once in a while though...




>When the world is going to pot and everyone is running around screaming bloody murder and you look over and see us just sitting there, the truth is this:We are not just enjoying the show because we have no human feelings and enjoy watching the rest of you freak out. As fun as that is, we are actually calmly and quietly taking it all in and deciding what is the best mode of action to make everything right. We care. We just can't let that cause us to do something that will make everything worse. It's called strategy people. It takes planning. Besides...screaming never solves any problems. So we'll stick with our method even if it makes us seem like insensitive jerks, k?




>When we say we want this-and-this done by this time next Monday and put here, the truth is this:We want this-and-this done by this time next Monday and put here. Period.




> If it seems like we're always bucking you and doing things our own way, the truth is this:You're wrong.Whatever it is your telling us to do, it must be wrong. And we know how to do it better. It's a hard thing to accept, but if something doesn't make sense to us, we tend not to do it. Crazy I know. It's not anything personal. We're usually unbiased when it comes to ideas; whatever works the best is what we're going to go with. Even if that idea doesn't come from us. We just like doing stuff right. And we will. Ever single time.
Your idea, or ours; it has to be right.




>When you disagree with us and we don't seem to care, the truth is this:We don't.We know we're right, and frankly, we don't give a hoot that so-and-so says otherwise.We come to conclusions in our life after careful and meticulous research.So we don't give a flippin' fadoodle if Oprah says you can make blue from orange and mauve; our research and reason says otherwise. And if Johnny Bobo doesn't get why we don't like ketchup on our hot-dog, he'll just have to get over it. We're not changing our mind.




>If we seem to do better in school than you, the truth is:We do.
But we don't have to go into that because we don't like to brag. True story.




>If we seem to have unrealistically high standards for ourselves and beat ourselves up over little things, the truth is this:Failure is our worst nightmare. We hate it.
We shiver at past instances of it in our lives. The possibility of it eats us alive. We do everything we can to avoid it (explaining why we are so driven).But unless you're Jesus (and we're pretty sure he was the ultimate INTJ but have yet to prove it), failure will find you.
And rip your heart out. And moonwalk all up and over the dang thing.
So that's why we're so hard on ourselves; our efforts to avoid failure aren't good enough.We weren't good enough. We're not good at anything. We're nothing, nothing, nothing!See my point? It just sort of snowballs.But take note: Just because we can point out and condemn our failings ruthlessly, that does not mean we appreciate it when others feel so inclined.Tread lightly friends; you walk among mines when you critique an INTJ or any Rational for that matter. You have a complaint? Fine. But you'd better be crystal clear about what it is we're not doing satisfactorily, because you do not want an bitter INTJ on you hands if your criticism was unjust or unwarranted. You know the whole "Mastermind" thing? Yeah. It comes in handy when planning revenge...




>When we rarely seem to have fun for fun's sake, the truth is this:Work is work and play is work.For us, it's all about earning and polishing the skills and then saving them for a rainy day. Or when stuck at K-mart.
We don't "just do" stuff. We do things with purpose. Yes friends, even fun must have a purpose.
We never ask you to understand these things. We just ask that you accept them.

>When we never seem to date, and insist on being "the perpetual single" in the group, the truth is this:Love blows our mind. It's strange, unpredictable and completely insane.
And its really hard for us to "get". We want to treat everything like it has a rational process and, as we've come to find out, Love just doesn't roll that way. It's world shattering."A difficult and threatening problem" is how the books describes how we view our mate selection. Yeah. And you forgot awkward, uncomfortable and unnecessarily complex. --_--Most of the stronger of our type can avoid this tempting, but complicated thing called Love. But a few have been known to surrender.Don't get us wrong. We love Love.We just can't put it under the microscope and figure it out, so it scares us. Which is fine because it's not like there are a bazillion people out there just dying to fall in love with someone who's hard to read emotionally, not even remotely out-going, needs lots of privacy and isn't too cheeky about being touched. But look, if you can get past all that and our bent towards world domination, we're pretty amazing lovers, parents and friends (so they say).




Bottom line: We like/tolerate people. We love truth. We hate failure and we do have feelings (safely locked away and gagged, but feelings none the less).



Without us the world would be a little less organized, a little less efficient, a little less accurate and a lot less evil. And we know it.

Boy, do we know it...*smile*

Come check out these Famous INTJ's and a couple of other people who somehow did something worth mentioning even though they weren't an INTJ. We're saying it's a fluke but you can check it out for yourself.

Jim Gaffigan Bologna clip.

Even Jim Gaffigan agrees with me when it comes to the pronunciation of Bologna.
Funny clip. Funny guy.
Enjoy!

Pride & Prejudice Quote Mugs by Brookish

"I love Austen Novels."
"I am fond of quotes."
"I enjoy hot beverages."
"Mr. Darcy is mind-blowingly attractive..."

If you have ever found yourself uttering one or two of these statements in the wee hours of the morning, after a rousing night of checkers and Mocha lattes, I must say, I just might have the perfect thing for you...

Ceramic "Pride & Prejudice" Mugs by Brookish
..............................................................................

These little beauties are a must for all sworn Austenites, and a welcome addition to any collection of passive admirers.

Some are cheeky:



Some romantic:
*front*

*back*



And some are just fun:



With one of these in your possession, you need never worry which mug to use when snuggling down to your favorite book...^-^


For more P&P Mugs and other lovely knick-knacks, be sure to check out the shop by clicking here: Brookish Shop on Etsy

*~ttfn~*

Crazy Caitlin Fact: How I learned to spell.

Once upon a time, as luck would have it, I was born.
Yes. Yes, it's true. My karma was just -that- good from the start.

So I was born, and born to two people I'll call Freda and Mo.
Freda and Mo were (and still are) my Parents, and like all good parents they decided that education was a key part to a happy and successful life.
Soooo...they home-schooled me.

Some cry foul, some cheer; either way the deed was done and many a strange and wonderful thing came from that decision.
One of those things?

The way I learned to spell.

Spelling is a funny thing, especially when you speak the English language.
We have this amazing mixture of words we just decided to borrow from all other languages.

"Beauchamp? Sounds complex and unnecessary. Sweet. We'll take it!"

Take for instance the word Bologna (of all the dumb...mmph!) . Who exactly was head of the spelling department at the Butchers shop?
.......................................................................................................................
"Well uh, -we- pronounce it 'Ba-low-nee' ...but uh, this is the best spelling job we could come up with at the time.
(awkward pause)
It was late."
.......................................................................................................................

How can you spell that word and -not- think to yourself "Ba-log-nah"?
Insanity dear friends. Prue and unbridled in form and notion.


But back to my Education...

It was different. I learned a lot on my own.
And because my parents kept a decently sized library containing many classics, I found myself at age 11 reading more Austen than Amelia Badilia.

The result? British spelling system.
I swear, I was nearly 14 when I realized the proper American spelling of color contained no "u".
Of course it didn't hurt any then but now I find it hilarious.
Because you see, the great irony was that at the same time I was spelling color the proper English way and understanding terms like "fortnight" and "3 and 20", I was still spelling Honey the Winnie the Pooh way.
Yes. Hunny.


Anyway I did eventually figure out the heresy, and further understood that Winnie the Pooh was not a reference to be trusted when it came to literacy.

It was a sad day.

I mean you grow up with these people...practically blood...and to find out they've be leading you astray the whole time? Heartbreaking.

I got over it eventually, and I am proud to say I can now spell pretty darn well.
"Tore" still gives me a bit of trouble now and then...(pathetic isn't it?)
I seriously never have to use that word, but when I do it's a guaranteed brain trip.
Thirty seconds of frenzied self denial;

"I know how to spell that word...there's a "u" in there somewhere right? Right? There's got to be. It does sound a little British to me..."

Introducing: Crazy Caitlin Fact.

New deal for the blog here; I'm going to give you little facts about myself so as to better convince you of my delicious insanity (I'm not -really- insane I just like pretending sometimes ok?) .
Sound great?
Awesome. ^-^
I'll be sure to post one within the hour.

(Translation: As soon as I'm finished with this post.)

P.S
<------You may have noticed I went a little crazy with the icons.
Yes. I have a problem. Found them all on www.fanpop.com
Fun site. Great place to go to waste away half your day.
Check it out. *smile*

For The Days I Felt Rebellious...

This is for...

The days when I said exactly what I was
thinking.
Those days I couldn't stop smiling
maliciously.
When I didn't care a smidgen about anything
anyone said.

Yeah, those days...

This is because of...

Those days I flexed my sarcastic wit
mercilessly.
The days when I insisted on being your personal
rain cloud.
When I would've sooner bit the dust
then bite my tongue...

Yeah, those days...

The days I freaked you out.
Made you mad.
Made you cry.
Stole your happiness.
Stole you thunder.
Stole your brush (you know the one).

The days I hurt your feelings.
Gave you headaches.
Gave you grief.
Broke your heart.
Broke your trust.
Broke your mug (accident).

For those days I felt rebellious
All I have to say is this...

Thanks...

One day I'll grow out of those days.
Those days I'm sure you'll miss.

Two Brothers

Two glossy ravens

patter along the rusted tracks.

Visual heat.

Green and Blue sheen

melds with the metals reflected light.

Like acid to the eyes...


Scurrying across the burning path

long ago deserted.

Sound numbed.

Golden grassy stalks that border

dare not bend or rustle.

Like an army in salute...


The fowls pace is quickened

as the sickly sun sinks west.

Day's surrender.

Darkness stirs from it's slumber

slowly inks across the sky.

Like blood dropped in water...


Liquid black pupils survey the change

and press on forward.

Tracks vanish.

The hollow way abandoned

never finished, left to rot.

Like the broken-hearted...


Turning back towards the sun's corpse

returning to where they had come.

They march.

Tiny claws tapping rhythmically

the melody of the tracks.

Like haunting echos of the past...

They march on.

Ten Things I Fancy That I Did Not Receive For My Birthday

{...in no particular order...}

1. An Entire Wardrobe Containing Anthropologie Clothing



2. A Mysterious and Romantic Masquerade Mask



3. An Antique Stereo Viewer



4. A Whole Wing of a Palace to Myself



5. A Lifetime Subscription to Frankie Magazine



6. A Whimsical Marionette Puppet



7. A Magical Carousel in the Forrest



8. A Bear-Hug from George Clooney



9. A Copy of "Ticket" by Cory Godbey



10. My Own Fairy Tale Adventure

Some-what Rhyming Update

Got my picture on my birthday!
Chris is married!
Meagan's left...

Saw "Year One"(wish I hadn't).
Found lost flip-flops.
Mine? Theft?

Friends still visiting. Just. want. sleep.
Need alone time.
Stop talking in your sleep!!!

No more cake or chocolate please.
Back to the gym
Won't admit defeat!

Two new pieces on the "Cafe"!
Check them out.
I was cynical that day...

Sleepy, stressed, grumpy, sad.
My tummy hurts.
Change makes me mad.

No more typing, nature calls.
God get ready.
Soon tears may fall...

(500) Days of Summer : Movie Trailer

So I came across this film preview a couple days ago, saw the trailer, wanted to see it.
It's quirky, cute, indie-ish and boasted the likes of Zooey Deschanel & Joseph Gordon-Levitt {can you go wrong?} .
So making my way to the discussion board to get the full low-down, I came across a shocking and other-wise depressing conclusion...

...that I won't be sharing here.

Meet me at the theater on 17th of July and you can find out for yourself.
Or you can go to IMDB like I did, and spoil it.

Either way, expect the bitter/sweet feeling to last for a couple of days...

...or years...

*~ttfn~*

Cory Godbey

My New Favorite Illustrator.
I stumbled upon him today while checking out another artist I had been curious about. I saw some of his posted work and was mesmerized...
So I followed the links to his blog where I found this...



Words can do no justice...

What a gift.
What an amazing ability he has that allows him to create images that unlock our minds and hearts to beauty eternal.
Oh how I wish I was that girl...

I hope you check him out.
His Blog: http: //lightnightrains.blogspot.com/
His Etsy Shop: http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6489197
A collective site for himself and other amazing artists: http://www.portlandstudios.com/

{As far as I know "Ticket" is not available in print, although I believe at one time it was. Here's to hoping it will be again soon!}

Complaints and Class; I've got 'em.

Writers Cafe is down, my Facebook quota has been filled for the next few years, I can't come up with anything to search on Etsy, and I can only read so many Yahoo stories.
So this is my only other option.

Ah...the quietness of the blog. I can practically hear my thoughts echo back to me, as I type them into existence...

'Tis magical.

*sigh* I need to get a hobby or something. Or even a theme. Just deciding on a solid theme for this blog would help me out immensely. I'm not sure why I even have a blog. I'm not helping anyone, I'm not helping myself. No one is learning anything or being entertained. Without purpose or design. I know that tune all-too-well.

Blah. This is getting depressing.
So to turn the mood, I'm going to show you some pictures of my two most recent purchases!
Excited yet?

First off we have my Lt. Edition wood print "Computer Love" by rosiemusic on Etsy. I was super excited about getting it and, even now, am anxiously awaiting it's safe arrival to my door.
I do so wish it was here now...


The cuteness is almost suffocating! Now to find a place to display it...

Next we have my new dress I bought for an upcoming night out to the Ballet! I wasn't sure it would work at first (being a little plain and, well dowdy) but I tried it on, and it fit like it had been custom made.
With Black kitten heels, clutch, pearls and a french twist updo, I'll be set!

On the hanger:


And on me (any excuse to wear it ^-^):


Very classic and retro. Reminds me of 60's Hollywood. Maybe a little Coco Chanel...?
Either way you spin it, it's mine and I love it!

So anyway, there we have it. I'd say we ended on a nice note today, but I must go.
Maybe someone's wrote on my wall while I was typing...hmm...
*laughs*
Tootles!

Movie Reveiw: Sherlock Holmes

Reviewing movie trailers. Something new I thought I'd try.
And what better movie to review than the new take on an old classic?
~~~
Sherlock Holmes.
~~~
I was so happy when I heard they'd be making a film based on the iconic character.
And Robert Downey Jr?
A strange choice but he's a great actor in his own right.

So harboring all the excitement that had been mounting since the day I first heard, I got my first glimpse today.

I could not look away...

...it was that disappointing.



My first and most hardy protest:
Rachel McAdam's Character.
Why?
WHY?!
Must we always have a sassy slut of a Hollywood portrayal in the stead of a perfectly good, well drawn out, and *gasp* complex female character?
(Sidenote: I have no hate for the Actress herself, I just find her character to be annoyingly misinterpreted and obnoxiously unnecessary.)

Also:
Can we not just forgo with the cheesy lines?
I'd rather watch half an hour of Mr. Holmes shooting himself up, than suffer through half a minute of the inevitable banter he and Ms. Adler will no doubt spew in an attempt to create tension and chemistry. Not to mention all the snippety lines Jude Law's Watson has the potential to share.

"Whoa ho!" you say.
"You haven't even seen it yet. You can't judge it by the trailer alone."
Oh but I can. And in all honesty, that's sort of the whole point of a movie trailer.
A clever device used to convince the greater public that this is the type of film they want to see before the film is even released.

*sigh* I -really- want to like this.
I really do.
But I'm not sure it will let me.

Anyway, I'll probably see it.
That's all they care about in the end.
If we'll pay or not.
I might.
I've seen much worse.

My closing thought: How long will we have to wait until Sir Arthur Conan Doyle is given cinematic justice?

Roses & Whiskey

Beautiful Tramp sucking slowly on a lit Cigar
Roses & Whiskey
Smoke curls 'round full lips
The room pulses with her breath
Doe eyes blinking
Temptation wears a Black Dress...

Someones Dirty Secret arched against the matted wall
Horror & Ecstasy
Twisting pearls like Men
Around her slender fingers
Ivory chest quivering
Seduction wears Stilettos...

The World's favorite Playmate when the lights are turned down low
Worshiped & Damned
Closer than you think
Choking on her breath
Lips loosening
Lust knows your name...

...Sin owns your heart.

{Inspired by the photo above. Hope you like. *smile*}

Real quick

Sorry I haven't posted in a while.
What can I say? Life stinks like that sometimes.
Anyhoo I just thought I'd share really quick one of my most favorite commercials.
I really could watch it over and over...



I am not a drinker nor do I endorse this product in any way, but I can say one thing about this advertisment: It sure as heck would be -some- rockin' party. *wink*

[Song is "Daylight" by Mat and Kim]

To the Mothers on this day...

...and especially mine...


...Thanks.

You know who you are...you know how great you are too.
Hey, if you've got it flaunt it.

Anyways I just wanted to say a quick thanks on this day, I'm not going to go into some long-winded speech about how much mothers contribute to the world because everyone should already know this.
And if you don't, well now you know (and knowing is half the battle!).

I think it's safe to say that we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you...*smile*

You rock and we love you.

To Mothers! ^_^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Print by Sascalia via Etsy

Yes, I've changed the title...

...It was bound to happen someday so I just made that day today.

What can I say, it was too long.
And sort'a dumb.
And cheesy.

Anywho it's been done away with.

Instead of "A Parade of Insanity Known Fondly as Caitlin" we have simply "A Parade of Insanity".

Everyone knows it's me we're talking about anyways so there's no real loss. *smile*

Sidenote:
The WritersCafe server is down and I am in much distress because of it. u_u
I have learned that at one point in the sites past, everyone's writings were deleted because of a similar occurrence and I -dearly- hope this is not the case.

*sigh* Just wish they would fix the problem soon...

The many faces of Lee Pace (aka Ned)

For you...*wink*



So I was bored and found this and had no other place to put it but here. *smile* Lovely show and actor. You wouldn't regret looking either up. Anyhoo, I gots to go. Enjoy and we'll chat again soon!

P.S
2nd row, 4th across. *wink*
Yes...^_^

Your own Delusional Hero

Once upon a time...

I thought I was different.

Thought I was special.

Thought I had talent.

Justified ambition.

Guess not.

Where'd I come up with that?

Once upon a time...

I thought I was important.

Thought I made a difference.

Thought my efforts mattered.

Unique execution.

Guess not.

When'd I start thinkin' that?

Once upon a time...

I thought I could change the outcome.

Thought I could be the savior.

Knew I could live with purpose.

Fulfilling grand destiny.

Guess not.

Why'd I ever believe that?

Delusional Hero, here at your service...sorry if I seem depressed.

Spare me your pity.

Listen well, know my folly;

Once...

...I actually thought I mattered.

*~The Buzz Lightyear effect: You realize one day that you aren't as great or important as you thought you were. And the hurt doesn't ever wear off.~*

If Only I Had Never

~* A piece written about a really hard time in my life. I'm still kind of grieving.~*


If Only I Had Never.

If I had never left...
I would never have missed my friends.
I would never have had broken memories.
I would never have sighed that sigh.
I would never have said those things.
I would never have missed that event.
Never have ached when I saw the empty spot,
In all the pictures I should have been.

If I had never left...
I would never have said good-bye.
I would never have felt like a deserter.
I would never have cried that night.
I would never have laid in bed all day.
I would never have fought that fight.
Never have wondered if they had ever really cared,
Or if it had just been a joke.

If I had never left...
I would never have spent all day alone.
I would never have ignored that person.
I would never have worried those I loved.
I would never have forgotten who I was.
I would never have cursed God.
Never have shut off my heart,
To save it from being hurt.

If I had never left...
I'd be waking up the to a mile wide sunrise.
I'd be wishing on the stars that never hide.
I'd be looking forward to everyday.
I'd be hopeful of the Future.
I'd be laughing in the Present.
I'd be content with my Past.
I'd be happy because I knew
There will always be tomorrow.

But...

If I had never left...

I would never have met that person.

I would never have laughed that night.

I would never have sang that song.

I would never have seen that sunset.

I would never have wrote those words.

Never have realized how much friends can mean,

Whether close or with miles in between.

I won a Contest!

I got first place!
Oh, the irony...how it stings (read a few posts down and you'll understand). *smile*
But still I'm happy and I'm going to share with you my winning piece. Written at a time when I was greatly missing my the years when I was a little girl, and mainly the days I shared with my three older brothers. Hope you enjoy!

"When Did this Happen?"-Caitlin R.

When did this happen? When did things change?

Wasn't it just yesterday that we were making tepees in the backyard? The lumber old and rotting and yet to us they were beautiful,grinning with glee as we peered out at each other through the gaps between the boards.

When did this happen? When did we get older?

Has it truly been that long since we climbed the Mulberry tree? Our feet stained crimson after trampling the ripe fruit. Climbing ever higher in hopes of reaching the top. I never got very far but instead watched as you passed from branch to branch with skill.

When did this happen? When did we stop playing?

When I was the princess and you the warriors? Sitting quietly on the bed while all of you battled for ultimate victory. Light-sabers,swords,guns and superpowers. Play fights turned to real fights that no one ever won. I watched by the sidelines, never understanding why these pretend duals were so important.

When did this happen? When did we forget?

That every shiny stone should be saved?

That pennies are priceless.

That playgrounds are Castles.

That a water hoes is a Rainbow maker.

That cut,scrapes, and bruises are meant to be treasured battle scars.

That a box filled with old clothes meant a play has yet to be born.

That love has no agenda, that forgiveness is given unbegrudedly.

And that every day should be lived to the fullest and that no one is ever left out.

Don't you remember? Have you forgotten?

Yes, I know you have. At least for now you have. Your world is so exciting now but in a different kind of way. I know things have changed and most of the time I'm glad but still some times I miss it: those precious few days of my youth. I see now that you are all on your way to adulthood which means I too will soon follow.

Is it OK, to be scared? Is it OK to feel stuck?

Reaching out to my future while still grasping tightly to my past. Afraid to let go, afraid to forget. But at least I have you to go before, to make a way, to clear the path. To tell me its OK, to cheer me on, to hold my hand. Because things will change and already have, and I'm ready to face what life has to give me, if you'll promise to help me out.

But tell me, when did this happen? When did we grow up?

In His Glorious Face

Once upon a time I was a little girl.
Very little.
Five.
It was a Sunday night.
We were at Church.
That's were it usually happens.
At Church.
Even at a young age.

I don't remember much.
The sermon, the people, the songs.
All I remember is when we went to pray...
To talk, I knew, with God.
Every head bowed to pray.
Like always.
It's just what you do.
But I didn't.
Not that night.

I paused.
I thought for a bit.
I turned my head up towards the ceiling, my eyes opened wide and searching.
My mother looked over and said a hasty "bow your head".
I obeyed.
But still I thought...at five I puzzled...

Why do we look down?
Why do we close our eyes?
When I'm talking to God I want to look up, into his face.
I want to see if He's looking and listening back.
How can you talk to someone if you don't look them in the eye?
Does He like that when we turn our face away and close our eyes and murmur?

The prayer ended.
But still I thought.
Why don't we let God see our face?
Are we afraid?

Extra, extra!

So I just started a new blog!

http://fashionthatblog.blogspot.com/

I must say I'm very excited about it. *smile*
Come! Follow! Enjoy!
It's all fun for me and I hope someone else can get a kick out of it.
Be sure to scroll down to the first post to get the scoop on why this particular blog came to be.
Thanks a lot my peoples and chat with you again soon.

I won a contest....

...Got 4th place.
And I was excited.
Very much so.
Until...
Ten.
Number ten.
Only ten.
And me the fourth.
Caitlin the fourth.
Caitlin the "not-even-good-enough-to-get-a-medal".
Caitlin the "you're-only-good-when-compared-with-nine-other-people".
That's me.
Me.
Just a little above average.
Good...but not good enough.
Ten.
Only ten.
And me the fourth.
Caitlin the fourth...
...never the first, never the best.

Just average...just good enough to be fooled.

Her Song

I see a room.

It is dark and filled with dusty old books and things many have long forgotten. The only light I see is that which comes from a large and lonely window. But it is raining outside, so the room remains in shadow. In front of the window I see an worn piano.
At it a small girl sits.

Playing.

Her dress is white and plain. Her hair dark and long. And if we listen closely we can hear her song as her fingers pass silently over the stained keys. The melody is haunting. Timidly she raises her eyes,looking out of the window into the rain....she is looking for something.

Searching.

But we see only the rain falling softly to the earth.....but wait. Someone is outside. The little girl sees but does not stir. She continues to play. We look closer. No, that can not be, it is not possible. Outside of the window, twirling in the rain, is the little girl. The very same one who is at the same time inside, playing. How can this be? Oh, but look; the little girl outside is laughing. Her hands are stretched high above her head and it seems as if she is reaching out to something, someone.

She is dancing.

Her joy is evident. But she stops. She has seen the window. She smiles softly and beckons to the small girl inside to join her. But she only turns away, still playing the hollow tune. And as she does the little girl outside slowly fades....and is gone.

The song plays on.

But look, what is this? Rain drops on the keys? How did they come to be there? The little girl does not seem to notice for she does not cease. A silent tear steals down her pale cheek and there, it has fallen to the piano. Her hand slips. A note is struck. Her song ends.

And she is alone.